Movie Review! Yay!

So tonight I saw the popular Eclipse. Now I never finished reading the series because I got so frustrated that this young girl was in love with a vampire. I just can't relate. I understand the difficulty in finding a decent guy but I have not reduced my desperate situation to pursuing another species! This film glorifies her dilemma: vampire or wolf? How about a man? Sure men aren't perfect but come on! They aren't that bad. Granted, sometimes they aren't that different from vampires or wolves. I mean, they always want to bite your neck, they run faster than you, they smell bad sometimes, and they usually are quite warmer in body temperature. Still, most of them won't kill you!

One of the first things I noticed about the film is that everyone is wearing a hoodie, except Jacob, of course. I'm not sure if this is a northwest fashion statement but I was so glad that I had my white hoodie. I felt like a true Twilighter (that's my new nickname for the Twilight groupies). I also noticed that before the little battle, the Cullen family were all adorned in their black jackets. I think I'm going to get my family to sport that style in our next family photo. And, if we are feeling really ambitious, maybe we'll use make up to make our skin a lighter, yay!

Now, this film is a drama but I found myself laughing hysterically at times. The first time was when bitter bridezilla sought revenge on her fiance for beating her in the streets thus leading to her becoming a vampire. This scene was so shocking, I couldn't help but laugh out loud because it seemed so ridiculous. However, I can't lie, I was scared! I always pictured that when a bride entered a room to meet her man it would be with a smile....not fangs! I thought, "Yikes! If I was a man I'd never get married after seeing that image!" So if your man is now getting cold feet, it's your fault for dragging him to see this movie in the first place! Shoot, it makes me scared to put on a wedding dress!

I also laughed during the battle when the vampires would break like mannequins. I'm sorry, but I just can't feel bad when people break like glass. It's just so ridiculous.

Now I want to address an important lesson taught in this film. In the movie it shows two incidents when a seductive female vampire falsely proclaimed her love to get man to lead an army of vampires to serve her own selfish purpose. What do we learn? First, women lie, especially when they are vampires. Second, don't fall in love with a female vampire. Third, anytime someone says they love you and then asks you to kill someone, you should probably reevaluate the way you select who you date. "Best bite" should probably not be a determining criterion.

Thanks to this film I have come to several conclusions for myself:

1. Still like men, human men.

2. I'm cool because I own multiple hoodies.

3. I'm grateful to be a woman or I could be at risk to be seduced by one of these demonic female vampires.

4. Taylor Lautner is the best looking 18-year-old I've ever seen

5. I want to make out in a field of purple flowers